As I sit here typing up this blog, all I hear is the quiet breeze of my air conditioning. Both of my girls are asleep. C is passed out upstairs in her bed after a fun day playing outside with her friends. A is snoozing next to me on the couch until I make our way upstairs for the night. I love hearing her content sleepy sighs. As a temporary single mom while my husband is deployed, I don't get alone of quiet time. C has pretty much abandoned the nap-taking ship since A was born. I was sad to see her stop taking naps because that's when I got a lot of my housework and other chores done. Now it takes twice as long to swap out laundry and fold them with C wanting to follow me and "help". I don't mind normally, but sometimes I just want to "get in and get out" so to speak.
I've also come to wonder if my eldest is hard of hearing, because she only seems to hear me when I yell. Scratch that, when I SCREAM. It is beyond frustrating when I am trying to get her attention or steer her away from harm (or doing something she's not supposed to do), I practically have to scream at her. Multiple times. I'm constantly feeling like I'm the "mean mommy". I want to be fun mommy every now and again... but when you're the only parent currently in the picture, you don't really get a choice. Even with my loving husband home I do end up being the disciplinarian, but I get a break from it and he'll step in. I miss the help.
So for now I will enjoy the silence until my sleeping children wake up tomorrow and it starts all over again. I just love their sweet noises, but sometimes mommy needs a little quiet time. All I can do is get through each day, and I'll be another day closer to my love being home. We love and miss you honey. Stay safe. ♥
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